Cool statuses in VK

How to change your status on VK

To create your cool status you do not need to open the settings profile. You just need to select the line under your name with the cursor the mouse. After that, insert or write a phrase and confirm it accommodation. Then you need to come up with or find an unusual status and post it on your page. Status will be more interesting if you write it from your own head, and do not borrow on other sites. But if you can’t come up with anything worthwhile, you can take them on our site.

Change VK status

The coolest VK statuses for guys

Initially, in the status column both on VKontakte and in For classmates, people wrote phrases that came to their mind precisely on this day. Often you could see that every day they are changing. Often, users simply shared their status in today’s mood. Leave messages to friends, write winged expressions of poets, favorite lines from songs. From year to year funny and funny statuses that came into fashion cheered up others and made them visit the page more often.

• A computer is better than any life partner: in sorrow and in joy, in poverty and wealth, in illness and health. Until death;
• I thought about my life … and immediately a swarm of flies appeared;
• Often in childhood with his parents played a game: “Who is faster clean the potatoes. “And only with age did he understand me somewhere fooled
• I wanted to enter a new password for the mail “x … th”, but in response they said that it should be longer;
• There are only two ways to control a woman, but unfortunately No one knows;
• Little girls like dolls and boys like cars. But with age, they change addictions;

See also: how to make a middle name in VK 2019.

• Here is a condom for you. Give it to dad and mom. And say to they didn’t do this anymore;
• When wallpapering, the most important thing is that there are no bubbles. And then we already somehow took two bubbles …;
• Do you know why a person’s ass is divided vertically in half, not horizontally. So that when you run, do not spank;
• Not everyone knows how koloboks breed. They make their way in susek and scratched;
• Never! You hear, never light your way IPhone in an alley late in the evening in Chertanovo;
• The most terrible drug is an ass. Absolutely sit on it all;
• Yellow wine is usually called white. Since it is made from green grapes;
• Egor has 11 apples, Nikita – 6. Konstantin has salt in the ass. A Now the question is: which of them ran the last from the orchard;
• If thieves infiltrate the house and turn furniture into looking for money, I will laugh and join them.

This is interesting: how to make a message in VK unread.

Cool statuses for girls

For girls, we also picked up some fun and unusual VK statuses that you can take for your page.

• Maybe enough to be decent if there is no personal life?!;
• Deception at every turn: I went to “Everything for the wedding.” And the grooms Where?!;
• No need to rush to call someone an angel. Take a closer look perhaps this is another miracle in feathers;
• Boys look like a station toilet – or shit, or busy
• It’s not good when girls laugh at boys, worse when they laugh under them;
• One of these days in the bus some schmuck climbed into the bag. At first not noticed. And today I opened, indeed – sits;

Do you know how to remove possible friends from the VK tape?

• Darling, but I don’t have panties on me! Alena, are you an idiot? Well, how can forget that you need to wear underpants !;
• In men, transitional age manifests itself in a special way. it when young girls no longer give, but from old rotates;
• I have been to different places. But one thing I want to get forever. On the page of your passport;
• My husband is never so careful sensitive, extremely attentive, as when it comes with a full plate of borsch to the hall from the kitchen;
• My boyfriend said that I am forever in his heart. And why am I not I guessed then that his heart was a hostel;
• If few people understand you, this does not mean that you – genius;
• It seems to me that my neighbors even wipe the dust punch;
• Do you like sweets made by beavers on milk light blue ladybugs ?;
• How great it is to rest after doing nothing;
• Wife to husband: how blind and deaf I was when I chose you. Husband: you see – with me healed of all illnesses;
• A man should not start a new one every day, but each same day.

Interesting statuses in VK for everyone

Statuses, because they are like underwear – every day you need new. Well, or at least once every few days.

• As always, before simple female happiness, it was still necessary some pair of centimeters;
• Yes, I often just need to keep quiet, but with … let it all know what I think about it;
• The farther from Monday, the closer Friday;
• Just do not trust the heart. It knocks …;
• Thanks iPhone. Now I know that my ears and hands are always dirty;
• Guys, stop doing garbage – in cold water we are all are equal;
• All secrets sooner or later are revealed under cognac;
• Typical show-off: at the ear of the iPhone, and the apartment saw repairs in 1981 year;
• Watch: “Dust” – on all televisions of the country;
• I was taken prisoner by the bed, but a sheet and a blanket were tied up and not let go;
• Super impudence: ruin the air in the crowd and resent louder all;
• Made repairs in the house. Started with hi-tech, ended with hi-tac;
• Little people are the last to determine that it is raining;
• The directors of the zoo simply did not digest everything. Only python smog;
• If hell has the Internet, then most people won’t even find change;
• Now I will jump with a parachute. Tomorrow I’ll tell everyone how I felt (updated 40 days ago);
• Ohhh, what beautiful little eyes are reading this status now … And what for the smile …;
• Come in, be at home, and over there near the stove wipe the floor;
• Layhak: got a deuce, start cleaning;
• Instead of a yellow card, the arbiter accidentally pulled out a condom. Before the end of the match, no player has violated the rules of the game;
• In this shameless skirt you won’t go to the disco. I’m not I understand it, Denis ?;
• I was not spoiled in childhood and did not buy anything. I grew up. Now I can’t buy anything for myself;
• Not everyone knows that a tea bag is brewed 7 times. On the the eighth he rises from the bottom to look at this press;
• Yes, I … Yes, I love you !!! I already said – no passport, no vodka.

Cool statuses in VK

Pay attention to cool and more serious statuses for your VK page.

• Remember: there are no borders;
• Before you say anything, check the connection of the brain to language;
• I don’t like the situation that you are in; change this attitude;
• You speak so confidently about it, as if you have in your pocket spare jaw;
• If life is a game, then you need to stay beautiful and wait good luck
• You can rather believe in gnomes and fairies than in true love;
• I can only find a common language with someone who can bite own;
• Life is already an online game in which the admin ban only one once, but forever;
• Pain is changing our thinking. It encourages us to think more, trust less and rely only on yourself.

Our cool and cool statuses for VKontakte are over. We hope you enjoyed them. If so, write your reviews in comments and be sure to return to the site again.